Andrey Kurpatov, a psychotherapist, writer, and columnist for many publications, defined the golden rules of his life. Bright Side suggests taking a closer look at them so perhaps these rules will be suitable for you, too.
- Never shift the responsibility for what’s happening in your life on others’ shoulders.
I understand that the temptation to blame somebody else is great, but have pity on yourself. You’ll find power at the moment you internally accept that you’re the author of all your failures and the creator of all your successes.
- Accept the fact that you can’t change the past — it’s over.
We can manage only our future that depends on what we’re doing right now. Don’t expect the future itself to be pleasing; do your best to make it smile at you.
- Get rid of the illusion that you can change other people.
Subconsciously, we all have this naive delusion that we can change anybody. As a result, we suffer because we can’t do it. Only circumstances can change people — everything else is just a perception of fraud. Allow others to be different, to be who they are. At some point, you may even start enjoying it.
- People need us to be strong.
Nobody needs you if you’re weak, tired, suffering or unhappy. If people pretend that they like you when you’re weak, they’re just misleading you. Don’t succumb to them! Simply agree with the absoluteness of this rule, exhale, try to cheer up, and you’ll realize that there is nothing to worry about at all.
- All our actions have consequences.
In fact, we always choose not what we’re going to do but what is going to happen as a result of our actions. Therefore, before doing something, think carefully about its consequences. By doing this, there will be fewer stupid things happening in your life.
- Don’t live like you’re going to live forever.
It is inevitable that each of us will die. You can suffer and worry about this fact, or you can make an effort to forget about it. Don’t live like you’re going to live forever. However, don’t live like you will die tomorrow. Heed both these statements, and you will find your own recipe for a happy life.
- Do what you consider important internally.
If you are wondering about the meaning of life, most likely, you’re just a bit depressed. What’s most important is not a particular «meaning of life» but the feeling that you live your life meaningfully. Do what you consider essential internally. Don’t forget to remind yourself of it from time to time. Don’t blindly chase success. If you just do what you feel is important, success will catch up to you.
- Don’t waste your time and energy on those who don’t care about you or who don’t love you.
In this world, there are a lot of people who like you, and with whom your life will be full of joy. Just don’t be a closed and suspicious person. Believe me — being open and kind will help you eventually reap the benefits.
Author: Andrey Kurpatov
Preview photo credit: belsveta.net